As you know, Dave’s brand new music single & video are out on Friday 21 March 2014. That’s not long! However, I know not everyone wants to be patient, so you’ll be pleased to know that I’ve considered what you’ve been saying, and I have a list of practical solutions, just for you.

1. Pacing Back And Forth

I’ve always found that when I’m waiting for the oven to pre-heat, time seems to move a lot quicker whilst pacing back and forth. I have not yet heard whether this is also applicable to waiting for a music release, however, theoretically, it should work. If anyone tries this, please let me know your findings.

2. Lose Weight

According to Einstein’s theory of relativity, due to gravitational time dilation, time moves slower within a stronger gravitational field. As you know, the more weight an object has, the stronger the gravitational field it will create. Therefore, if you lose weight, there will be less gravity, and time will move faster around you… wait, but that would mean that your time would be moving faster than the rest of the world, so you would end up waiting longer. Erm. I’m surprised you’re still reading this.

3. Time Flies When You’re Having Fun

Whilst you’re waiting for the single release, why not take up a new hobby? Maybe you could find something that you’re truly passionate about? I have a single release coming out on Friday, perhaps waiting for that will be fun?

4. Read Misleading Blog Posts

There’s plenty of stupid articles on the Internet, and you will find that after you’ve read them, time will have progressed.